Off for home I go, where my new Clerks DVD awaits my return. And then… sleep… wonderful sleep. I’m so tired at this point that I feel like I’m going to meet Tyler Durden at any second. My goal tonight? The computer is staying OFF. We’ll see how I do.

I’m in sort of a funk today, so I haven’t been posting much. I took a look at the power bloggers list and it looks like I’m not the only one. Wonder what’s going on in the world today?

I just love it when I find exceedingly useful information out here…

You know, some days I just love reading my horoscope:

“You’re having a particularly hard time communicating with almost everyone around you. Now may be the time to escape a little; perhaps check out some new QuickTime videos or tune out to RealAudio sounds.”

WOO HOO!! I finally have an excuse! It’s in the stars! Don’t believe me?

Yes boys and girls, it’s migraine time. It’s feeling like someone’s been trying to scrape my brain out of my skull with a melonballer. Make that a dull melonballer. Luckily I haven’t hit the puking-and-hate-the-world phase. I’m still in the plain ol’ hate-the-world part. It’s not too bad if I don’t do any strenuous activity like, oh say BREATHING. Ow – those capitals hurt.

On the brighter side, my ice hockey team had its first victory last night – a 7-1 win. What can I say? When we decide to win, we decide to win. Winning is good.

I’ve just noticed something unusual and felt that I should tell you people, just in case I’m never heard from again. There is a tape dispenser sneaking up on me. Somehow, it’s crawled up to the top of the cubicle and seems to be rather close to me. In fact… I think it’s a little closer than it was a few minutes ago. This is rather worrisome, since I’ve only had three Cokes so far today. I think I’ll need a couple more before I can reach my prime escape speed.

If you don’t hear from me soon, look for a fat tape dispenser with an evil look about it.

Ahhhhhh… Productivity, thy name is Caffeine. for some reason we have a TON of Coke in the fridge here and I’m a happy little camper. Not to mention there was a piece of cake in the breakroom to swipe some frosting from. I made sure and took it from the back so they couldn’t tell. BWAH HA HA HAAAA.

Errr… that was diabolical laughter, by the way. Uhhh… yeah.

?It?s a little disappointing that the media is glomming on to a minor softening.?

Who needs porn when you have Nintendo execs who don’t think before they speak? Too bad we won’t get to hear people say “Jigglypuff” with relatively straight faces anymore.

Down with boy bands! Here’s something fun to do while Napster still exists – hunt up a nice cheesy novelty song (Christmas ones are my favorite) on beloved Napster. Find a boy band song out there that’s relatively close in size and rename your novelty song to this one. If the sizes are off a little bit, give it a DJ mix name. Having a novelty song bigger than the boy band song is ideal. this makes it look like they’ll have more to listen to. The teeny-bopper downloads the file (56K users make me giggle), excitedly double-clicks the file and hears:

“Jingety jing!
HEE HAW HEE HAW
It’s Dominic the donkey!
Jingety jing!
The Italian Christmas donkey!”

Guaranteed minutes of entertainment! Be careful though – Dominic the Donkey is now my favorite song on my playlist…

Ego nolo online esse. Web est fabula.